That Awkward Moment…

When some dude messages you through OKCupid.
And he’s one of your ex’s buddies.
Whom you’ve met.
Who doesn’t realize that he’s met you before.

And he says this to you:

I am, legitimately, curious about your view on polyamory. I have a good friend that is writing a book on the subject […] It would be interesting if a random internet person had the exact same beliefs.

And you stare at the screen.
And you facepalm a bit.

And you want to write a response like this:

Hi there [DUDE] –

As it turns out, I’m not a ‘random internet person’ – I guess you don’t remember, but we’ve actually met a few times, a few years back when I was dating [EX]. Small world, eh?
And, after reviewing the evidence that I’ve acquired (experienced) during a lengthy relationship exploring polyamory with [EX], I can definitively state that my views and his are not in alignment on this subject.

Hope that clears things up for you.
Bye now.

But you don’t say that.
Because you’re a grown-ass adult.
And you don’t want any drama.

And it’s not really this dude’s fault that he just brought up a remarkably uncomfortable subject about your ex. He probably  genuinely doesn’t recall meeting you two or three years ago. And he probably just thought you were cute, or interesting, or something, and is just trying to make conversation.

Which means that being snarky is really just being rude.

So, instead, you do nothing. You just sit there, staring at the screen, repeating to yourself: This is fucking weird, man. Just. Fucking. Weird.